- The old "car's broken down" routine is nothing new.
"A day or two ago
I thought I'd took a ride
And soon Miss Fannie Bright
Seated by my side
The horse was lean and lank
Misfortuned seemed his lot
He got into a drifted bank" - Jingle Bells
- Reindeers are bullies and hypocrites.
"All of the other reindeers
Used to laugh and call him names
They never let poor Rudolph
Join in any reindeer games
Then one foggy Christmas Eve,
Santa came to say,
Rudolph with your nose so bright,
Won't you guide my sleigh tonight?
Then all the reindeers loved him" - Rudolph, The Red Nosed Reindeer
- If you can't find a priest or vicar to wed you and your sweetheart, just build a snowman.
"In the meadow we can build a snowman
And pretend that he is Parson Brown
He'll say are you married
We'll say No Man
But you can do the job
When you're in town" - Winter Wonderland
- As a baby, Jesus was a freak child who never cried when woken. (I seriously doubt that)
"The cattle are lowing
The poor Baby wakes
But little Lord Jesus
No crying He makes" - Away in a manger
- In terms of bullying people into giving you treats, Halloween has got nothing on Christmas.
"Now bring us some figgy pudding
And a cup of good cheer
We won't go until we get some" - We Wish You A Merry Christmas
Oh, the idiocies we sing.
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